Chaplain believes gay wedding photos should be captioned ‘worthy of death’

As marriage equality becomes ever more present in North America, there’s still a rather vocal minority making the claim that gay marriage will eventually lead to man-on-dog marriage, which will lead to Armageddon, which will lead to rapture and yadda yadda yadda. Some of you might remember this as the logic behind “If You Give a Mouse a Cookie,” only way worse.

Recently, Chaplain Gordon Klingenschmitt was discussing a case wherein a photography studio violated their state’s Human Rights Act for refusing to photograph a gay wedding. In response, he decided it would be fair if photographers could caption photos of gay wedding with a particular Bible verse. The line in question, according to The Huffington Post, is less than flattering.

The verse in question? Romans 1:32, which states, “Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.”

“God’s law is the highest law,” Klingenschmitt declared.

Bitch, if you’re really so concerned about upholding the sanctity of marriage, why aren’t you on the frontlines demanding that divorce be made illegal? You’d figure that people disolving a marriage would be a greater threat to the whole sanctity thing than a couple of gay guys or lesbians looking to settle down and maybe raise some kids.

But you know what? I’ll level with you. You get to caption our wedding photos with your crappy-ass quotes, but on one condition: you have to admit that this has nothing to do with the sanctity of marriage and everything to do with your own squeamishness, and you’re using religion as an excuse to justify your personal opinion. Just say it aloud once, and you can write “dick-stroker” on all my pics for all I care.

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