10 Things I Hate About The Holidays…Pt 2

Before I continue on with my anti-Holiday list (check yesterday’s posting for 6-10), get this:

Just got back from the Vancouver Men’s Chorus’ “Making Spirits Bright” show, which opened tonight. If you’re looking for some festive cheer, get in there and support some great singers. Here’s a blurb from their site:

Making Spirits Bright 2008

The VMC’s very popular mainstage
holiday concert returns to the warmth and crystal-clear acoustic
of historic St.

Paul’s Anglican Church (1130 Jervis Street) in Vancouver’s
West End. This year, there are five shows: Dec 11, 13, 14 (matinee
and evening) and 15. The program—with its
lighthearted focus on humour—brings together all of the elements
essential to the festive launch of the holiday season. An added fifth performance completes this year’s offering from the
Vancouver Men’s Chorus. Be sure to buy
your tickets early online
and
make your spirit brighter. For more information, visit: http://www.vancouvermenschorus.ca/

And now <drumroll> here’s my final five:

5) Sit-com Christmas Episodes

This year, I got Jennifer Aniston and the rest of her “zany” cast mates something extra special: a gift-wrapped punch to the face. Ho ho ho!

4) Cranberry Sauce

Everybody else is eating it, so why can’t I?

Mmm…tastes like zombies.

3) Relatives who never ask questions and talk non-stop about themselves and/or tell long pointless stories that no one wants to hear

I can’t really restrict this hate to relatives or just to the holidays. I hate this all year round.

2) Velvet thongs

“Great for Christmas, your Holiday’s, Valentines day or just to feel special!
100% Polyester.
” – hairless model not included, but irregular capitalization and bad grammar are free of charge!

1) Rudolph

 

What the fuck are you looking at, Rudolph? Wipe that face off your head, bitch!

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