2 min

Creepy “love” exchanges

It was all hands on deck today, with
Turmel, Harper and Rae all in the House. We were spared the worst of mawkish MP
tributes to their spouses during Members’ Statements, and only a smattering of
Valentines-themed statements made it through (seriously, guys – they’re not
clever. Just stop), and then the fun began. Turmel took all five questions of
the opening round, and threw everything she could at Harper. Torture? We have
detailed protocols about that. Warning shots? You guys used to support the “Lucky
Moose Bill” and we hope you will continue to. The death penalty, abortion,
Hitler comparisons? We don’t want to reopen those debates. Changing OAS eligibility
by 2020? We’ve been clear that we’re not cutting, but reviewing the future
viability. The whole issue with the F-35s? We’ll operate within the established
budget. And with Turmel’s outrage deflected, Harper turned to Rae’s questions,
which focused on the Ontario Court decision striking down mandatory minimums
(Harper: You guys supported those changes to the law when we implemented them
in 2008), and the impacts on privacy from the Lawful Access bill (These changes
have been sought by the police and were agreed to by every provincial

Charlie Angus and Françoise Boivin kicked
off Round Two by carrying on with the question of Lawful Access, to which Toews
assured them that everything they said the bill would do was in fact false –
and then Toews and Boivin went on this creepy back-and-forth about “love” and
floor-crossing. Seriously, I think Boivin even shuddered at one point –
possibly when Brad Trost interjected from the backbenches “wholesome love!”
Creepy. Linda Duncan and Jonathan Genest-Jourdain asked about First Nations
education (John Duncan: We’re working in partnership!), Peter Julian and Brian
Masse asked about the F-35s, seeing as the usual critics were absent (Fantino:
The usual bafflegab about properly equipping our men and women in uniform), and
Jean Crowder asked about the HMCS
’s damage in grossly hyperbolic terms (MacKay: Seriously? We’ve
been open and transparent about this whole process, and even put out press
releases!). Francis Scarpaleggia took another stab at Lawful Access (Toews:
Your party brought forward similar legislation in the past), and Hedy Fry asked
about the growing court backlogs that the omnibus crime bill would exacerbate (Nicholson:
We’re addressing problems – like drug trafficking!). Megan Leslie, Jamie
Kennedy and Claude Gravelle finished off the round with questions on oil
lobbyists and the Northern Gateway pipeline (Oliver: Jobs, jobs, jobs!).

Round three saw questions on breaches of
veterans’ privacy, CETA affecting Toronto jobs, the constitutionality of
mandatory minimum sentences, warning shots, funding for local sports
facilities, public safety funds for a particular Northern Quebec community (John
Duncan said he’d take it under advisement), the importance of community
newspapers, and particular technical issues around Chinese investments in the
oilsands, and how it relates to national security provisions of the Foreign
Investment Act.

Sartorially speaking, snaps go out to Maxime Bernier for his tailored grey pinstripe suit with the light blue shirt,
and a blue tie and pocket square, and to Michelle Rempel for her nicely cut
black jacket and grey top. Style citations go out to Lois Brown for her puffy
indigo jacket with the orange patterns and design-heavy sleeves that looked
like a wizard’s robe from afar, and to Dany Morin, who has not yet burned that
fluorescent yellow shirt that he insists on pairing with a black suit.

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