Sure, it’s not easy to become great at BDSM: it requires a lot of work, intelligence and more than a fair bit of training. But the good news is that this city has many means to help you fine tune your technique. So if you’re really serious about learning something new and having a little more fun with your sexuality, Toronto’s a great place for dirty, fetishy fun.
As wonderful as it is to expand the horizons of your sexuality through kink play, the reality is that it’s really, really easy to completely fall on your face if you don’t know what you’re doing. Chains and whips may be exciting, but a single-tail whip can slice clear through human flesh, floggers can cause serious kidney damage, and bad diet-kink porn can literally bore you to death.
But here’s the good news: Toronto has a thriving kink scene, and the number of resources available to those willing to learn is astounding. If you’re willing to stretch your limits a bit this year, consider this a crib sheet to help you get started.
For most newbies, buying leather will be the first step toward kinkhood; unfortunately, leather isn’t cheap. Thankfully, you can still find great leather on any budget. Northbound Leather and Priape are two of the best places to get quality fetish leather in Toronto, if you’re not afraid to dip into the SM ATM. Yes, it’s expensive, but when you remember that Northbound in particular offers free repair on all items bought from their store, it does even out in the long run.
However, if you’re on a smaller budget, you can still show off your kink without breaking the bank. Minimal-wear pieces, such as jockstraps and harnesses, run for much less than a full ensemble, and sportswear can also be bought on the cheap while still retaining fetish sensibilities. And if you don’t mind buying secondhand, you can get some pretty decent leather for next to nothing in Kensington Market or at leather swaps.
Now, as I said before, throwing on a leather jock doesn’t mean you actually understand jack shit about kink play. You’re going to actually have to learn how to play properly; otherwise, you could hurt yourself or others. If you’re interested in boning up privately, there’s a ton of great literature on kink theory, practice and etiquette. Any bookstore worth its salt should have a section dedicated to kink, but if you want something dedicated to the LGBT community, a visit to Glad Day Bookshop should help you find a suitable manual.
That being said, a good know-how isn’t going to do much if you can’t get the physical technique down. So what to do? You have quite a few excellent options on this one: the first is So You Want To Be Kinky, a group that regularly puts together fetish tutorials at Club120. If you want something within the Village, there are a number of workshops and demos put on by the Black Eagle.