Drinking Santorum

If that headline had you gagging a little, the rest of this is just going to make things progressively worse for you.

By now, we all know what Santorum is, so I’ll give you the Seinfeld version of all this: Rick Santorum is an anti-gay bigot, yadda yadda Dan Savage yadda yadda Santorum now means shit-lube-ass-juice.

Can you believe it took people this long to capitalize off shit-lube-ass-juice by turning it into a cocktail? And can you believe I wrote this post just so I could see how many times I could type shit-lube-ass-juice and get away with it?

If you ever happen to be in New York City and you have a very specific fetish, you can now imbibe your very own Santorum cocktail at the Pacific Standard. The cocktail, though not actually made out of shit-lube-ass-juice, is a mix of Bailey’s and Stoli, which gives it a nice brownish tinge, and it’s topped off by chocolate shavings.

That being said, you may want to get someone to test it out for you. You know, just to make sure that it’s actually . . . edible.

Also to make sure that it’s not shit-lube-ass-juice.

Keep Reading

The new generation of gay Conservative sellouts

OPINION: Melissa Lantsman’s and Eric Duncan’s refusals to call out their party’s transphobia is a betrayal of the LGBTQ2S+ community

Over 300 anti-LGBTQ2S+ bills have been introduced this year. This doesn’t mean we should panic

OPINION: While it’s important to watch out for threats, not all threats are created equally. Some of these bills will die a natural death

Xtra’s top LGBTQ2S+ stories of the year

The best and brightest—even most bewildering—stories from a back catalogue brimming with insight

Elon Musk and Texas attorney general Ken Paxton are suing Media Matters. Here’s why queer and trans people should care

OPINION: When politicians and the rich leverage the power of the state to quell dissent, we all lose