In this, my third installment of holiday songs for people who don’t like holiday songs, I would like to thank one of my favourite filmmakers, Mr John Waters.
In the spirit of the holiday, I would like to present not a song, but a scene from one of Waters’ films. Waters has a bizarre love/hate relationship with holidays: this is a
man who said, “I love Christmas so much I could fuckin’ shit.” He’s even
put out his own Christmas compilation album. But it’s in Female Trouble that Waters presents what could be a Norman Rockwell holiday morning, but soon turns into a grotesque Christmas vignette.
In the way that Gremlins or Die Hard is a Christmas movie, I would almost say that Female Trouble is one as well. Although there is only one scene in the film that happens at the most festive time of the year, the holiday hooplah that Waters gives us (as well as the oft-quoted “I better get them cha-cha heels") in this scene makes for a very merry fucking Christmas in my house.