I drink your Kool-Aid!

Y’know, having spent more than eight years wailing about the sick devotion to George W. Bush still shown by a remarkable 25% of the American public, I would obviously feel more than a little hypocritical about treating Barack Obama like our new saviour.

But I don’t care!

I’m watching the inauguration on TV today, wearing Chris Bishop’s hilarious T-shirt and basking in the thrill of watching history in the making. Honestly, I never believed we’d see a black president in my lifetime — even Eddie Murphy said so in 1983:

Now, as I’ve documented here over the last few weeks, Obama’s track record on helping we the (gay) people has been shaky but journalist Rex Wockner has been asking a number of queer American movers and shakers what they think and the consensus phrase seems to be “cautious optimism.” I think I may have found Obama’s theme song:

Mere weeks after being elected the first openly gay mayor of Portland, Sam Adams has admitted to the same sexual affair with an 18-year-old intern that he vigourously denied during the campaign. Oh Sam, Sam, Sam, how could you forget the cardinal Clinton rule already? It’s not the sex, it’s the lying!

It’s almost certain that Obama will bitterly disappoint the gay community at some point (even more than he has already) but for now, I’ll still praise him to the skies. Why? Because just by being himself, he’s pissing off nutjobs like WorldNetDaily founder Joseph Farah, who writes:

“When the rule of men conflicts with the commands of God, the Bible leaves no doubt about where we should stand.

That’s why I do not hesitate today in calling on godly Americans to pray that Barack Hussein Obama fail in his efforts to change our country from one anchored on self-governance and constitutional republicanism to one based on the raw and unlimited power of the central state. It would be folly to pray for his success in such an evil campaign.

I want Obama to fail because his agenda is 100 percent at odds with God’s. Pretending it is not simply makes a mockery of God’s straightforward Commandments.”

 

“Anchored?” I can’t believe he said “anchored!” Obama was elected because America is not anchored. It’s out to sea. It’s the Titanic. It’s hit an iceberg. It’s hit three or four icebergs. You don’t need to read The Onion’s terrifyingly funny coverage of the Bush years to know that we’re in much better hands now.

I say “we” because a) the American president has more say over Canadian lives than we’d like to admit, and b) our own guy is no prize. Inspired by the website poking fun at Obama’s instantly iconic HOPE poster, I can only say it with this:

Would John McCain have had a website this fun? I don’t think so! So I’ll be cheering Obama on today as he’s sworn in as the 44th President of the United States, even while I tweak his image to pay tribute to my real hero. Seriously, my dog has done more for me than any politician ever!

A former editor of the late, lamented fab magazine, Scott has been writing for Xtra since 2007 on a variety of topics in news pieces, interviews, blogs, reviews and humour pieces. He lives on the Danforth with his boyfriend of 12 years, a manic Jack Russell Terrier, a well-stocked mini-bar and a shelf of toy Daleks.

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