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Madonna to host gayest Superbowl halftime Show ever

BY ROB SALERNO – The NFL formally announced that the 2012 Superbowl halftime show will feature Madonna, backed up by Cirque du Soleil, in what will likely go down as the gayest Superbowl halftime show ever. 

How gay will it be? This is what Cirque du Soleil members look like when they’re just getting warmed up.

Here’s hoping this routine will make it into the final show.

Of course, the other benefit to having Madonna perform at the Superbowl is that if any of the players get injured, she can just suit up and jump right in. With those guns of hers, she should be able to hold her own on the gridiron.

Incidentally, this won’t be the first time the Superbowl halftime show has gone gay.

The halftime show was traditionally an opportunity for marching bands to gat a rare moment in the national spotlight, and we all know drumlines were formed just so that gay guys could wear sequins in public. It wasn’t until the 1990s that the halftime show started booking major acts; in those years, the halftime show took its first tentative steps out of the closet, featuring the New Kids on the Block in 1991, Gloria Estefan and gay figure skater Brian Boitano in 1992, and Michael Jackson in 1993. Since then, Estefan, Queen Latifah, Christina Aguilera and ‘N Sync have all performed, but never has the show just come out and said, “I’m gay” the way that having Madonna perform over naked Québécois acrobats no doubt will.

Welcome out of the closet, Superbowl halftime show. You’ll like it here.

Maybe your example will help all those young aspiring football players who are still in the closet.

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