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Manhunt offers Tom Cruise lifetime membership

Gay dating site Manhunt is trying to regain the relevance it lost post-Grindr by making an addition to the publicity whirlwind surrounding the Tom Cruise and Kate Katie Holmes divorce. 

"Dear Tom,” the letter reads, “sorry to hear about the split. Now that the cat’s (or Kat’s) out of the bag and you’ve realized that traditional marriage is a mission impossible, maybe it’s time to explore your options?"

Personally, I prefer Tom Cruise in the closet. I just don’t find five feet of repression appealing, unless we’re talking dick size . . .