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Northwestern University proves bisexuality exists six years after proving it doesn’t

The New York Times published the article “Straight, Gay or Lying? Bisexuality Revisited” in 2005, which was about a study done at Northwestern University. Here is a part of the report, which suggests that bisexuality does not exist:

In the new study, a team of psychologists directly measured genital arousal patterns in response to images of men and women. The psychologists found that men who identified themselves as bisexual were in fact exclusively aroused by either one sex or the other, usually by other men… Using a sensor to monitor sexual arousal, the researchers found what they expected: gay men showed arousal to images of men and little arousal to images of women, and heterosexual men showed arousal to women but not to men. But the men in the study who described themselves as bisexual did not have patterns of arousal that were consistent with their stated attraction to men and to women. Instead, about three-quarters of the group had arousal patterns identical to those of gay men; the rest were indistinguishable from heterosexuals.

Fast-forward six years, and Northwestern has further experimented on the existence of bisexuality. Here is an excerpt of their findings from The Advocate:

In both studies, men watched videos of both male and female same-sex intimacy while their sexual response was monitored. The results [of the new study] showed that while bisexual men responded to both male and female videos, gay and straight men did not. “Someone who is bisexual might say, ‘Well, duh!’” lead study author Allen Rosenthal, a doctoral student in psychology at Northwestern, told The New York Times. “But this will be validating to a lot of bisexual men who had heard about the earlier work and felt that scientists weren’t getting them.” 

I know I’m about to seriously offend some people (I love you, and I’m sorry!), but I stand by my opinion that bisexuality does not exist. I’ve met many bisexuals; every girl was a tramp and every guy was a total fag. Think about how many girls are bisexual as compared to guys. Sometimes, it seems like every girl I know is bi. I want to say, “Honey, drinking too much tequila every now and then and eating out your best friend doesn’t make you bi; it just makes you a slut.” I don’t necessarily think that sexuality is as black and white as gay and straight, but I’ve yet to meet someone who I’ve been convinced genuinely likes to cock crunch and muffin munch equally.

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