RuPaul’s Drag Race alum Trixie Mattel will be on hand for the finale of Vancouver’s Next Drag Superstar. (@trixiemattel, Twitter)
Thursday, Feb 4
Search For Vancouver’s Next Drag Superstar
We all have that one friend that thinks, and tells us over and over, that they are the best thing in drag since Willie Taylor. Now you can tell them to put up or shut the hell up and strut their stuff as Celebrities brings back its once in a lifetime competition. Watch the preliminaries tonight and cheer on your favourite queens each week until the grand finale on Thursday, Feb 25. Who will take the prize, and who will be shipped off to Untucked? Join emcee Iona Whipp, and the finale on Feb 25 will include celebrity judge Trixie Mattel, from RuPaul’s Drag Race — and may the best woman win!
9pm. Celebrities Nightclub, 1022 Davie St. Tickets $10 at Little Sister’s, 1238 Davie St. www.facebook.com/events/197757850574844/
Friday, Feb 5
Taboo Sex Show
I’m not saying I have this problem, but some people I know suffer from pooped out pecker syndrome, or POPS. It’s when the little guy just can’t hold the flag up anymore. This show will bring the life back to any POPS activist, gay or straight, with the testosterone from the crowd alone. With everything to spice up your escapades including Body Heat All Male Review, Rope Bondage, Best Ass Competitions, Burlesque, and even a nude stud, Brent Ray Fraser, painting a portrait with his hefty penis paintbrush. Now that is worth the ticket alone.
Runs from Feb 5–7, various times. Vancouver Convention Centre, 999 Canada Place, East Hall, B & C. Info and schedule of performers, seminars and events online. Tickets at door $20, but $5 off at www.tabooshow.com/Taboo-Vancouver
Wet & Wild
Looking for fur, horny men, and slippery soap in a shower? Well my address is — ha, I wish. But you will find me here, at a night that has become one of the busiest on Davie Street. Teaming up with Steamworks, Pumpjack brings you the meat you crave — and there’s even a shower to clean it up. Join Vancouver’s own artist extraordinaire Stephen Sadowski, along with two others, in the shower stall. Throw hunky DJ Nick Bertossi into the mix and you will definitely be staying the night. Sorry, I already have the job as fluffer for the evening as Del Stamp is out of town.
9pm. Pumpjack Pub, 1167 Davie St. $5 cover. www.pumpjackpub.com
The Gay Agenda: Untucked
This night will answer a question I have always wondered and probably should see a psychiatrist about: Which drag queen is packing the most, and who needs a whole roll of duct tape to hold the beast down? A bevy of Vancouver’s own drag queens will be untucked and flopping as they strip for Peach Cobblah’s amateur Rainbro strip show. Place your bets early and pick a winner from Jane Smoker, Peach Cobblah, Shanda Leer, Shay Dior, Raye Sunshine and a few surprise strippers as well.
Doors 9pm, show midnight. The Cobalt, 917 Main St. Cover $9. www.facebook.com/events/174330816260721/
Saturday, Feb 6
I figured out a while ago that I best not go to a Tomboy event and drink — some of the kings are so hot they can even fool an old dog like me. Tomboy is two years old, and to celebrate, they are snapping on the suspenders, balling up the socks, snapping on their bow ties and having a swanky night of performances, dancing and Jazz. Slide down to the juice joint early and grab a table stage-side and sip your whiskey like a hot shot. Prizes for most dapper outfit.
10pm–3am. The Media Club, 695 Cambie St. Cover $8 before 11pm, $10 after. www.facebook.com/events/564505700385448/
Getting stripped down to the buff, covered in multi-coloured paints and rolled onto a piece of canvas I can actually fit on is something I would actually do — I’d even frame it on the wall. The fact that it would happen in front of a bar full of people watching, and drinking, is a different story. But don’t let me hold you back. Richard Frechette is an amazing conceptual artist that does fantastic “live art” pieces. For a donation, you can have a one-of-a-kind piece of his art that nobody else will ever have. This is an evening to “celebrate the human body” that has something for everyone, from lotions, potions and lubricants to go-go dancers, photography, art and more. Hosted by Velvet Steele.
9pm–2am. Club 8×6, 1775 Haro St. Admission $20. www.facebook.com/events/507013912801712/
Year Of The Monkey
Spank the monkey — now that would be a lunar year I could get into. I’ve practised enough. I’m, technically, year of the horse; what am I supposed to do with that? Anyway. Matt Troy brings you a night to celebrate the Lunar New Year like nobody can. A 650 square metre space with music, art installations, performances, and an Asian artist showcase featuring drag, performance, video and DJs. A variety of spaces will be set up including The Dragon’s Den, The Monkey Forest and the Red Lantern Lounge (see, no horse area). This is a cross-cultural, post-colonial, queer-friendly and liberated space for everyone.
Sunday, Feb 7
Inner Beauty Pageant
I know I am just full of inner beauty — all I need is a bottle of Patron to let it out, and I’d have this competition in the bag. If Honey Boo Boo can enter a pageant, so can I. This will be your chance to get the crown. This pageant is open to all genders, ages and body types. Let loose and let your inner Carlotta out to prance, or cartwheel, down the runway and win over the judges. Hosted by Evita Versace, there are three rounds of competition: Formal Wear, Talent and Outfit of Choice, and there is no right answer to any of these categories. Pop that booty.
8–11pm. The Junction, 1138 Davie St. Cover $7 + donation. To enter and more info at http://toofly.ca/pageant/
To be honest, I live for this event. I try not to get my friends to go because there will always be something incriminating that can be used against me afterward. I met my husband-to-be at a Bearracuda night where he stalked me. Matt promises this Bearracuda to be the friskiest, horniest one of them all, and this is in the perfect venue for it: lots of hidden nooks and crannies, and a great place to dance. Hot and furry go-go men and all the bears you can eat are promised.
9pm–2am. The Hindenburg, 23 West Cordova. Ticket $20 at door.
What would a long weekend be without women letting loose at Hershe Bar? This is one of the longest running women’s events in the city, so you know they are having a great time. Their nights are legendary, the women are hot and the tequila is flowing. Sexy beats, countless possibilities and hot DJs all in a safe, inclusive space. If you are new to town, just visiting or haven’t been to a party in a while, this is the place to be on any long weekend. Flygirl loves what they do and it shows.
10pm–2am. The Red Room Ultra Bar, 398 Richards St. Tickets $15 at Little Sister’s, 1238 Davie St or at www.flygirlproductions.com
This is the night I get in touch with my sexy, soulful self. Get ready for DJ Almond Brown from Seattle, who is also a producer, remixer and vocalist — and has shared the stage with Deborah Cox, Mark Farina and many more. Joining the decks will be DJ G-Luve, a Vancouver legend, as well as our own talented DJ Mr Cox, who has just come back from spinning at Whistler Pride. This will be an evening of sexy soulful house music to carry you right through the long weekend.
11pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. Cover $5 at door. www.facebook.com/events/1523715877928428/
Monday, Feb 8
I seem to yell out inappropriate scenarios whenever the audience is asked to participate in an improv show. None of my suggestions are ever picked. Don’t get me wrong, the ones they use are downright hilarious, but I think mine are better. Dirtier and nastier, sure, but funnier. That said, I still have fun watching this hilarious troupe that brings a very funny queer experience to the crowd each week. Getting a laughter fix on a Monday night seems to make the work week go by a lot faster. You do not have to be queer to enjoy their shows; you will still understand every word.
8–9:30pm. XYYVR, 1216 Bute St. No cover. www.facebook.com/events/1515742732089081/
Wednesday, Feb 10
Fuck The Cis-Tem
Hosted by Pride UBC, march for a safer and more accessible campus for LGBT students, particularly for those who are most affected by cis-sexism, transphobia, and transmisogyny. Issues such as gendered housing and washrooms, incompetent health care and inaccurate education about LGBT experiences from faculty will be addressed. All genders, sexualities, and bodies are welcome to participate.
2:45pm. Martha Piper Plaza Fountain, University Blvd, UBC Campus. March route around UBC will be posted the day of at www.facebook.com/events/956522457730543/
Editor’s note: A previous version of this story did not specify that Trixie Mattel would only be a guest judge for the finale of Vancouver’s Next Drag Superstar.