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Roundup archives: March 2008

Each weekday, xtra.ca tells you what stories have queer people talking.

Mar 31, 2008

Bill O’Reilly, who you may remember once infamously described a non-existant plague of lesbian gangs terrorizing America, wants to see a bunch of San Francisco gays a-salted. Meanwhile, this columnist apologizes for awful, awful punning.

Speaking of awful punning, the American Family Association is going after General Motors for airing ads during LOGO’s airing of the film “Adam & Steve.”

The Edmonton Journal profiles one of Alberta’s gay rights heroes.

Mar 28, 2008

Coffee-table book publisher Taschen announces a very NSFW new curio, showcasing the largest and most tastefully photographed penises, apparently all from years before razors were common household items.

Radical anti-gay policies at two midwestern US schools? Surely, that can’t be right, can it?

Meanwhile, Cuba is moving to pass the Caribbean’s most sweeping gay and trans rights laws. For those keeping score, Cuba will soon join South Africa among nations once (and still) denounced by the US for their human rights records, but which now grant queers more rights than the US does.

Mar 27, 2008

Guadalajara may force gay businesses out of its core for 2011 Pan-Am Games. Montreal did the same thing for the 1976 Olympics. Should Torontonians be worried about its upcoming Pan-Am bid?

According to the Vancouver Sun, the Catholic Civil Liberties League is complaining about queer inclusion in the BC curriculum. Despite the obvious editorial slant of the blogger writing the article (nice use of scare quotes in the second paragraph, Ms. Steffenhagen!), the comments posted so far do not seem to agree.

Mar 26, 2008

The Harper Tories have been sending agents scripts to use for calling radio call-in shows. How could they have come with something so deviously clever as sneaking messages into a dying nineteenth-century medium, mostly used by conservative cranks anyway? Also, not the first time this month a Conservative politician has been disgraced by misrepresentation on talk radio.

China’s pandas are being given a regular diet of porn and ‘sexercise’ to help increase captive pandas’ interest in the opposite sex. Sounds like more communist anti-gay brainwashing to me.

According to a study, bullies tend to relate poorly with their parents, suggesting gay-bashers and their victims might have more in common than they think.

Mar 25, 2008

The New York Times profiles the world’s toughest gay, ultimate fighter Shad Smith. The incredibly hot article inspired me to dig up another apt New York Times piece.

Poland’s consul-general agrees to meet with a New York gay couple after Polish President Lech Kaczynski uses footage of their Toronto wedding to argue against gay rights in Poland. Hopefully the meeting will answer the age-old question: how many Polish people does it take to apologize for an incredibly tacky President.

Bill Clinton verbally bitch-slaps Melissa Etheridge and a sixteen-year-old girl in fell swoop. Video is thankfully available.

Mar 24, 2008

Slow news weekend… back with real news tomorrow. Happy Easter!

Someone claiming to be the victim of the roof-wang prank I mentioned last week sent me this video, insisting that the penis is, in fact, healing America. I don’t know. America’s had a giant penis governing it for seven years and it only seems to get worse. And really, healing America seems like a tall order for what turns out to be a publicity stunt for a local indie rock band.

Also, more YouTube fun with penis.

And in celebration of Easter, don’t forget to pay homage to Zombie Jesus.

Mar 20, 2008

Tel Aviv is trying to position itself as an international gay tourist destination, hoping to corner the market on gays who want to be the victims of violence not directed at their sexuality.

Did Shakespeare and Marlowe both miss England’s first gay king?

A homeowner in Pheonix, AZ is hoping a giant painting of a wang on his roof will heal the United States.

Mar 19, 2008

Dina Matos McGreevy denies participating in a threesome with her ex-husband — former New Jersey governor Jim McGreevy — and his aide. This story is no longer interesting, unless Jim can produce video evidence.

David Rimmer, owner of Ottawa’s After Stonewall bookstore suggests closing Montreal and Toronto to make an Ottawa gaybourhood viable. Alternative proposal not considered: turn Ottawa into a dynamic, creative urban centre by recognizing a small, yet vibrant gay village! For someone who owns a gay bookstore, you think he would have read Richard Florida’s Rise of the Creative Class.

Pennsylvania, home of Santorum, considers anti-gay-marriage legislation. So much for brotherly love.

Mar 18, 2008

Someone’s noticed that there are a lot of gays in South Florida, which is amazing, given how withdrawn and restrained South Florida’s gay community is.

Plays about gay Mormons getting national audiences in the US. I bet they’d get even bigger audiences if they partnered up with the men of mormonsexposed.com.

Gun rights are gay rights, according to the (US) National Journal, because, um, gays should have unfettered access to vigilante justice. Or something. Whatever. It’d still be funny to see Heston chant that one.

Mar 17, 2008

Norway considers legalizing gay marriage. Actually, gay marriage has a long tradition in Norway. Just ask Thor.

Canwest notices that gay refugee claimants have a difficult time proving they’re gay to the Immigration and Refugee Board. Shocking how no one’s noticed this lapse before. What? Oh.

Australian government workers are being asked to provide details on the sex lives> to the government, presumably so someone can write a steamy tell-all memoir, which in Australia is called a wankadoo.

Mar 14, 2008

Focus on the Family founder James Dobson worries that there won’t be anyone to take over the Christian right when the current generation of bigots dies or is caught up in gay sex scandals.

Greek activists will try to hold the country’s first lesbian civil marriage next week.

The Dutch are set to legalize gay sex in an Amsterdam park, hopefully giving Ontario’s political leaders something to think about.

Mar 13, 2008

A private school principal is under fire after parents discover his horrible, sub-teen-angst poetry on his personal website, and are shocked by its violent and sexual content. “The earth-shaking messianic orgasm / and the absolute ‘fuck me and fuck the world.'” Is this principal also the lead singer of Silverchair?

The number of people being sucked on in their sleep in Toronto’s gay village goes up fivefold. Of course, I’m referring to the bedbug epidemic, not to sexual assault, which is never funny. Unless you sexually assault a bedbug. That’d be weird.

Apropos of nothing, Robbie Williams, naked, coked out of his mind, bragging about God’s gift to the people… or something.

Mar 12, 2008

The federal Liberals hit an embarrassing new low: They now say they won’t bring down the Harper government because of the upcoming Easter weekend. Presumably, the Liberals’ election readiness team requires the full and uninterrupted support of the fucking Easter Bunny, and that weekend is just the worst time of the year for him.

Oklahoma State Rep Sally Kern claims freedom of speech to say gays are worse than terrorists, sticking to her long defence of the first amendment as long as it doesn’t apply to those she disagrees with.

Former Aussie Baywatch hunk Jaason Simmons comes screaming out of the closet, announcing plans to marry his partner in Canada. In celebration of this event, let’s take a look at some clips from back when he was culturally relevant.

Mar 11, 2008

Pope adds pollution to the list of mortal sins. Now my coal-fired sodomy machine is doubly immoral.

Harper threatens an election over a Liberal private members’ bill that amounts to a massive, $2-billion tax cut that benefits only incredibly wealthy parents of young children, which the NDP also supports. Ugh. Perhaps the Liberals plan to campaign on a “lesser of two evils” platform.

New York’s Democrat Governor Eliot Spitzer apologizes after being caught in a high-end prostitution ring…. These stories just aren’t as fun when it’s not a Republican.

Mar 10, 2008

Spain’s pro-gay Socialist government narrowly wins reelection. In celebration of the safety of Spanish gay marriage, let’s review los espanoles mas guapos del 2007!

Rosie O’Donnell invites American Idol loser Danny Noriega to perform on her next gay family cruise, instantly making him more successful than at least four Idol winners. Meanwhile, another loser hopes to be a spokesperson for gay rights.

And George Clooney clarifies the whole gay thing.

Mar 7, 2008

As The World Turns fans are up in arms that a gay romance plot on the show is leaving the all the kissing and, I presume, shirtless, under-the-covers lovemaking, off-screen, because just watching soaps isn’t quite gay enough.

But Buffy The Vampire Slayer is going gay. At least for a few issues of her comic book series. To catch Buffy on some muffy, check out Buffy Season 8 issue #12, now on sale from Dark Horse comics.

Gay Catholic leaders plan to confront the pope during his upcoming visit to Washington DC by releasing statements over television, radio, and the internet ahead of his visit. Seems like a rather soft approach to deal with someone the Washington Blade called 2005’s “anti-gay person of the year”.

Mar 6, 2008

Alec Baldwin slams his brother’s anti-gay-marriage stance. In honour of Baldwin’s support, enjoy this classic sexy SNL skit.

Yet another gay refugee faces deportation, this time a Malaysian man living in Montreal. Sadly, he’s one more in a recent string of gay refugee cases, but at least these stories seem to be picking up more mainstream media coverage.

And now for Hollywood’s cutest couple: Grey’s Anatomy star TR Knight and his boyfriend Mark Cornelson.

Mar 5, 2008

An HIV outbreak in Britain’s gay porn industry leads to a crackdown on barebacking films. This is a terrible story, but I still can’t help but chuckle at the thought of some BBC journalist typing out the phrase “Britain’s leading bareback film company, Icreme…”

A Tory MP announces plans to enter a civil union with his same-sex partner. Oh no, not in Canada, in Britain, silly. Here in Canada a Tory MP would have to change parties first.

A British commando unit is reprimanded after playing “Naked Bar” in a Norwegian pub, urinating on a fellow soldier who’d passed out after too many drinks, and shouting obscenities at the pub’s female patrons. The story was pretty hot, until I saw the picture about two-thirds down.

Mar 4, 2008

Japan’s top porn censor was arrested for not stopping enough porn. Let this be one more lesson to Harper about the futility of censorship.

A Hungarian cop is fired for appearing in a porno film. This seems to be happening a lot lately…

Russia’s culture ministry drafts a bill to restrict distribution of “erotic materials” and censor erotic images on print media like magazines and books. This is certain to cause debate in the cabinet, as erotic materials constitute some of Russia’s most valuable exports.

Mar 3, 2008

Liberals finally start talking seriously about taking down the Harper government, and all it took was a two-year-old criminal accusation they’ve sat on for at least year and that has absolutely nothing to do with policy or substantive matters. Well, I’m glad Dion took that year and a half to carefully define himself as a man who stands for everything the Tories stand for short of breaking the law. That’s bold.

Italy’s highest court rules it is a criminal offence for men to touch their nads in public. For those keeping track at home, touching your own genitals over your jeans is against the law, while raping a woman wearing jeans is entirely lawful.

Wonder what being locked in a metal tube with Kathy Griffin for 13 hours feels like? The Advocate captures that experience here.

Previous Months:

February 2008
January 2008
December 2007
November 2007
October 2007
September 2007
August 2007
July 2007
June 2007
May 2007