2 min

Straight bottom pornstar Kurt Wild

He's worth jerking off to

Kurt Wild takes it from 11-inch wonder Barrett Long. Still from Barret Long's XXX Amateur Hour.

Writing this column, I stumble upon my topics in weird places. For instance, I’m watching the Tyra Banks Show, and it turns out to be research. She’s investigating gay-for-pay pornstars. Hot.

Straight pornstar Kurt Wild (sometimes “Wilde”) is one of her guests. He does gay porn, almost always as a bottom, and he’s also famous because he was fired from a Subway restaurant for being a pornstar. Although Wild is straight, he considers himself part of the gay community, which is totally valid.

The thing I like about Tyra is this: even though her show is technically trash TV, her history is fashion, and she is surrounded by homos. So she’s not being judgmental about gay men when she interviews the gay-for-pay boys. She asks really cool questions, including a hilarious segment where she says, “Okay, it’s daytime television. Um, how we gonna do this? Okay, it’s Christmas: do you like giving the gifts or receiving the gifts?”

But I have to mention, the fucking news editor from The Advocate Tyra brings on for balance is a sex-negative, straight-phobic bitch. I want to slap him.

He says shit like, “You get to be gay-for-pay for a small period of time; you don’t have to deal with the discrimination.”

I’m sorry, hello? Straight guys who do porn, who go on the Tyra Banks Show and defend their gay-for-pay roles and speak highly about the gay community? Trust me, they get discriminated against. So shut up, you silly person. Let us jerk off.

Speaking of which, Kurt is a hot guy. I want to see how he performs in porn. I go to, the massive pay-per-view site. The kid is everywhere with all the mainstream actors. Brent Corrigan, Dak Ramsey, he’s all over the place. Even with Barrett Long, the famous man with 11 inches. I check out that scene.

I see why he’s a star — Kurt loves cock up his ass. Or at least he is a good actor. He moans, he whines, he groans, his cock is hard. He talks dirty. He tells Barrett he likes getting spanked and fingers his ass.

I love gay-for-pay models. Because you know what? It’s fucking porn. They are doing a job. Gay guys can do well with the same job, but they are less likely to excel. Straight guys usually overcompensate: they take the job seriously, they treat it like a job, they don’t get lazy.

Check out Kurt Wild. He’s a fucking hot, straight bottomboy worth jerking off to.