1 min

The script is awful and that’s the high point

All The Rage will cause only one kind of rage

BORING. Stewart (David Vincent) and Christopher (John-Michael Lander) join the audience in sleep. Credit: Xtra files

If Roland Tec’s first feature, All The Rage, was a film about straight men rather than gay, it would have never been made.

Selling itself as a satire of the life and loves of A-list fags, it is far too shallow to offer either the insight or humour necessary for satire. Scene after scene, these privileged men drone on and on about their money, their sexual conquests and their trips to the gym.

Give us a break! Beverly Hills 90210 dealt with intimate relationships with more depth than this.

Check out this particularly choice bit of dialogue when Christopher’s friend challenges him about his high standards for the perfect boyfriend: “Which test did Troy fail?”

“First of all – he was a total gold digger. He only agreed to meet me because he thought I had money.”

“You do have money.”

“So, does that mean I want a man who’s looking for it? Just because I have money, doesn’t mean it’s my duty to marry a poor man. I want someone rich, just like everyone else.”

“Whatever for?”

“So I can be richer.”

Unfortunately the script is one of this film’s strong points. The acting is so wooden that you feel you are sitting through a first-day line reading rather than a finished film.

The audience’s endurance is oddly rewarded by a short closing scene in which Christopher drops his facade of congeniality – verbally and physically attacking a trick in his apartment. It is a powerful moment, in which his fascistic spew of insults at his twerpy date provide a cutting slice of satire and makes the tedious hour and a half that comes before almost worthwhile.

No, on second thought – better to skip the whole painful experience.