Blogs & Columns
13 min

The sex lives, fears and curiosities of HIV-negative men

Mark S King, the HIV-positive creator of the blog My Fabulous Disease, interviewed four negative men to get their candid views on HIV.

AJ has never “slipped up” and not used a condom, whether he’s hooking up with someone positive or negative. He is open to sexual/romantic relationships with positive men.

Unlike AJ, Aethan would not knowingly sleep with an HIV-positive man. He believes HIV is a “death sentence” but admits that his “fear prevents me from hearing about the real risks of catching HIV.”

Derrick is on PrEP and does not always use condoms. “Bare sex is the best sex,” he says.

Evan has slept with men who are HIV-positive and undetectable because he feels “it’s much safer than sleeping with someone who is negative and may not actually know their status . . . You can have a much deeper connection when you’re having sex with someone without a condom and you’re not scared of anything and you’re coming in each other’s holes.”

The conversation covers a lot of ground and offers four varying insights on HIV in 2014. The interview subjects open up about everything from concern that positive guys forget what it’s like to worry about catching HIV, curiosity about the events that lead up to someone becoming positive, whether HIV-positive people live with less fear and more sex, and the ticking “time bomb” that has some of them wondering — am I next?