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The sheep & the dead

Fake emails target schools' antihomophobia campaigns

A Toronto-area man opposed to anti-homophobia initiatives in Ontario schools has been sending fake emails under the names of various legitimate groups.

The groups victimized include the Ontario Sheep Marketing Agency (OSMA), the Ontario Association of Cemetery and Funeral Professionals (OACFP) and Rainbow Youth Niagara (RYN). The emails were sent to a number of people including provincial education minister Kathleen Wynne, employees of Xtra and its Ottawa sister publication and mainstream media across the country.

All three organizations have sent out replies angrily denying sending the emails, although none would comment directly to Xtra.

The emails equate anti-homophobia initiatives with fabricated demands for antizoophobia and antinecrophobia intitiatives.

One email falsely attributed to OSMA states, “It is our humble opinion that your program however very commendable does not go far enough as it totally ignores issues of zoophobia and the totally unfounded fear of bestiality in Ontario schools and leaves issues of harassment of youth attracted to farm animals as objects of their sexual preferences totally unaddressed….

“Zoophilia and bestiality are much more common in rural Ontario and zoophobia in rural schools is a very serious problem that when not properly addressed can be as devastating as homophobia is in urban schools…. Anecdotal evidence abounds of young boys being ostracized at school after they were spotted having sex with farm animals (mostly sheep). In many cases harassment of zoophiles is so intense that it drives boys to commit suicide.”

The email goes on to offer the services of Ontario sheep to students.

“Our sheep will get proper sexual stimulation; Ontario boys will learn safe sex practices and learn how to obtain sexual gratification without resorting to sexual harassment of Ontario girls.”

Another email explains that the most effective way to fuck a sheep involves wearing too-large cowboy boots.

“Oversize cowboy boots are the most essential piece of garment that you have to wear in order to have safe sex with sheep as they tend to use their hind legs to kick you while you are trying to have sex with them,” states the email.

“Normal procedure is to walk up to a sheep from behind, grab the sheep’s rump and lift it up into the air high enough so the sheep’s hooves are above the top of your cowboy boots. You than align the sheep’s rear legs in front of your leg and force the sheep’s hooves into your oversize cowboy boots.”

The fake email from RYN offered support for the supposed antizoophobia campaign.

The email purporting to come from the funeral association expressed similar sentiments, but about the prejudice faced by young necrophiles.

“This is a very serious issue affecting all children of people working in the funeral industry that urgently needs to be addressed by the Ontario Ministry of Education,” states the email. “They are subjects of discrimination and cruel jokes that are way more distasteful than the ones that are told about homosexuals and their sexual practices…. Our necrophiles engage in much safer sexual practices than homosexuals who are practicing sodomy as there are no reports that they have ever infected any dead person that they ever had sex with.

“We would like to join forces with you and offer our stock of dead clients as anatomically correct props for the purpose of sexual education of Ontario boys and girls. That way our dead clients would get well-deserved sexual stimulation; Ontario boys would learn safe sex practices and learn how to obtain sexual gratification without resorting to sexual harassment of Ontario girls.”

The writer then proceeds to advocate turning funeral homes into “dead stripper and dead hooker bawdyhouses.”

In its reply to the emails, the funeral association states that it has contacted police in Ottawa — where it is based — about the fraudulent use of its name on the emails.

The man who sent out the emails has a long history of sending homophobic emails on an almost-daily basis. Often multiple e-mails are sent out on the same day.

The last e-mail received by Xtra before press deadline was titled, “Faggots at Globe and Mail launch frontal attack on Tony Clement,” and includes attacks on Henry Morgentaler, the BC College of Teachers — referred to as the United Faggots of BC — and the Canadian Union of Public Employees, referred to as the United Faggots of Ontario.