Canada
6 min

Toronto Pride diary: Pierre Fitch, Bruce LaBruce, sex and lots of cock

As seen through the eyes of Goodhandy's co-owner Todd Klinck

Fri, Jun 19: Bisexual Pride

Pride Toronto officially starts Fri, Jun 19 and runs until Sun, Jun 28. Driving up Church St to the beer store, I can feel the increase in energy. The village is more vibrant, there are visible tourists, and the boys are decked out in tight shirts. We host Bisexual Pride tonight at Goodhandy’s — a fun group of people.

Sun, Jun 21: Hanlan’s Point and Bruce LaBruce’s party

I love Hanlan’s Point but often don’t remember its existence until late summer. I wake up, see the sunshine, realize that our evening party is not starting until 11pm and decide to head to the island. Fluke of luck: the city workers go on strike the next morning, so this may be the last trip I take to the island for months. I head to the farthest end of the beach and find a spot to set up camp. I get naked and lie down. It’s pleasant to see that naked men still wander through the bushes looking for activity. My location is on the edge of a mini sand cliff that overlooks and masks a tiny beach area from the eyes of those further down. It becomes a private stage show for me as I direct men to do things to each other, using only body language and eye contact. I love that men are so efficient and animalistic in our homosexual activities. It makes me proud. I head back to the mainland to host a party with Bruce LaBruce at my club, featuring a live military porn shoot. The crowd is sparse, but that’s to be expected on a Sunday. The boys (Jordano Santoro and Johnny Maverick) do a great performance, complete with film references to the movie The Sergeant.

Wed, Jun 24: Porn Pride with Pierre Fitch

Pierre Fitch is a big gamble for us at Goodhandy’s. We’ve never charged cover on a Wednesday night, and let’s be honest, gay people don’t like paying cover. But we had an opportunity to book Pierre Fitch for a very rare, exclusive, expensive appearance. The kid is a porn superstar — I’ve been jerking off to him for at least five years. And he deserves whatever fees he demands, because unlike many porn stars, he looks exactly like his photos. He is one of those rare people who possesses perfect skin, a gorgeous body, face and cock, and who looks exactly the same now as he did five years ago.

The gamble pays off — the club is filled to capacity before 11pm and Pierre delivers the goods. It is surreal to me, at the end of the night, to see Pierre Fitch in our slightly ghetto upstairs studio (okay, we call it a studio, but it’s also a coat check), lying there on the classic Goodhandy’s blue sheets, working on his orgasm. Just like so many of our wayward boys have done in the past. I’m like “Wow, Pierre Fitch is in our house.” It’s an honour and a pleasure to work with this boy. He has a reputation for being a diva, but we treat him with honesty and respect from the get-go and in return he is a total professional and a joy to work with. He’s got the most severe case of ADD outside my own, and he’s studying to be a DJ. I knew this, so I arranged for DJ Blackcat to spin — I’m a huge fan of DJ Blackcat — and the night ended with Pierre and Blackcat, side-by-side in the DJ booth sharing an educational moment. I get drunk and dance a little.

Thu, Jun 25: T-Girl Pride

I wish Toronto would consider extending liquor service until 3am, or better still 4am. Cities with late liquor service have more life, more edge, more grit. Tonight is the first of four nights of extended liquor service at Goodhandy’s. There is no rush between 2 and 4, rather, a steady flow of interesting characters. The place feels like an after-hours club, and I like the vibe. It reminds me of when I used to work at boozecans. Is there anybody else out there who wants to join me in starting a movement for later bar service? In honour of Michael Jackson, DJ Carma and I download Dangerous to finish the night, which I purport to be MJ’s finest album. 

Fri, Jun 26: Degenderit

Dykes, trans guys, and queers of all sorts. Tonight is the third Degenderit and it makes me very happy. It’s like a reunion of American tourists, quality drag king and burlesque shows and a great dance party with Shane Mackinnon afterwards.

Sat, Jun 27: Cockfest

I have never seen so many cocks in one place in my life. Ever. Today is a cock marathon at Goodhandy’s: the TNT!MEN (Totally Naked Toronto Men Enjoying Nudity) have their annual party from 3pm to 9pm, followed by my “dude” sex party from 9pm to 4am. At about 4:30pm I decide that I’m going to be brave and get naked in front of my staff to show my support to TNT!MEN. It is liberating and joyful. I don’t stop moving for the entire day. Toilets overflow, and I’m naked mopping them. In the middle of the party, I see a guy walking around upstairs fully clothed. I go up to him and say “Hi there, the clothing check is that way,” as he looks lost (and nudity is mandatory for TNT!MEN events). The guy (who is an American tourist) says “Oh, do I have to get nude?” and I say “Yes.” And he says, “I’m F to M, is that okay?” We have a brief discussion where I say, “Listen, I don’t know if TNT!MEN has dealt with this issue much yet, and I can’t promise that you might not get a weird glance or a double take from some of the guests, but if you’re brave enough to break down this barrier, do it. You are a man, and this is a men only party so you belong here.” He says he is happy to do it, he goes and gets naked and heads straight to the sex area and disappears for at least a half hour and when he emerges has a big smile on his face. He punches me on the shoulder and says “Thanks man” and gets dressed and leaves.

I mention the situation to the board members of TNT!MEN, and they say, “Hey, a lot of bears have tits. A lot of guys have small cocks. It’s cool.” Very happy to hear, and even happier that this revolutionary organization has now officially moved their parties to Goodhandy’s. And the perception that I falsely had for years that nudists were sexphobic (I heard anecdotes over the years that nudists did not welcome any sex at their parties) is shattered today — these guys are pigs! Sure there is a good core of them who just enjoy dancing and experiencing nudity, but the entire upstairs of the party is a sex fest. I know this as I cleaned up the mess during the break between the daytime party and the nighttime party. The best part about the party though is seeing the acceptance of all different types of bodies. I have my own body image issues too — and being naked with the TNT!MEN is therapeutic. I put on my underwear for the rest of the night and the party picks up the pace again around 11pm and goes non-stop until the end. It’s definitely a night where we need to mop multiple times….

Sun, Jun 28: Recovery

I want to go to the parade — I always go to the parade — but I need to sleep after 18 hours of penises. I wake up at 2:30pm and after a quick Google search I discover that this is the first year the parade is being broadcast in its entirety. Awesome. I order some delivery and lay down and watch. The CP24 commentary is pretty asinine (if those hosts said “gay Pride Parade” one more time I would have thrown a brick at my TV) but it’s still interesting to see the parade live. I discover that Xtra.ca is posting pics Twitter — so lying in bed I can watch the parade on TV while getting updated photos on my Blackberry of specific floats. Pretty cool.

At our Sunday night party I bump into one of my regular customers who is from Afghanistan. I enjoy talking to him because he tells me really interesting details about the way sexuality is dealt with in Afghanistan — something that you will never read about in mainstream journalism. For example, his uncle has a boyfriend, the whole family including the wife knows about it, they make jokes about it, it’s no big deal. He says we are way too uptight here about labels. He’s from the upper class in Afghanistan and he has a friend visiting, who has some insane job, like “Minister of the Interior of Narcotics” or some crazy diplomatic government title. He tells me “I took my friend downtown today, but I didn’t tell him it was going to be the Pride Parade. He takes one look at it, looks at me in disbelief, and says ‘We’ve known about this sort of thing for 10,000 years and these people are making it into a parade?'” We laugh.